Posted by: Worried mom | 2008/06/10

Moms with young school kids!

At what age did your child start doing homework by themselves, and in particular at what age did they start studying by themselves?

I'm at my wits end with my son, I put in so much effort, time and energy that I have nothing left for my family. I feel resentful and angry because my son shows no interest in his studies or schoolwork, unless I do it with him. When I help him study, he gets distinctions, but when I tell him to study by himself, he fails. He's been on a "study skills" course, and I've also taught him how to study. His IQ is above average. He's in grade 4 and from what I understand, the other mothers don't put 10% of the effort into their children, that I do. I want to run away.

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Our expert says:
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Try also the parenting forum, for more responses from other moms. You don't mention your son's age at present. If he is capable of distinctions, it may well be that he is clever enough to find the curriculum and schoolwork boring , and would rather find something more challenging ( even if it's evading the routine school work ). Ask around if there are extra sessions availabkle for bright kids, to add spice and challenge to their routine work

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Our users say:
Posted by: Worried Mom | 2008/06/11

Maria we don't have a set rule for rewards/punishments. When he gets good marks, we praise him and I take him for a milkshake, or he can take out a DVD game and when he does bad, we talk to him nicely but he doesn't get punished. Maybe I should draw up a list of rewards and make punishment (withdrawal of privileges) clear to him beforehand?

Mmmmmm, it's a terrible time for me, but I know it's even worse for him.

Thanks for the help.

Reply to Worried Mom
Posted by: Mmmmmm | 2008/06/11

Were in grade 5 now and i promise you its the same. Not letting up though and i suggest you carry on as well. Grade 4 is the WORST. Push through and drill in the importance of an education.

Reply to Mmmmmm
Posted by: Maria | 2008/06/11

Are there any unpleasant consequences if he fails? Rewards when he succeeds? Perhaps he just doesn't have any incentive to study on his own, and enjoys mom's attention?

Reply to Maria

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