Posted by: BUZZZZZZZ | 2006/07/24


I was molested at a very young age this never bothered me until last year about this time - eventually I told my parents and they couldn't believe it. It was my brother that done this to me.

And nobody has spoken about it to this day. I feel my family has failed me - everybody is so nice with him and it seems to me they have forgiven him - I can't forgive him no matter how hard I try - I hate him and I wish this comes back to him over and over again. I don't have anyone to talk to I haven't told my Fiance either I don't know how - I don't know how he is going to react!!

Please help me with some advise how I can get over this - I'm getting married soon but I don't want to see either of my family.

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Our expert says:
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I think that when acusations of this sort arise long after the event, it is likely that family members will find it confusing and may hesitate to take sides. SO urgently, see a good local psychologist / counsellor, to explore this matter and work with your feelings about it, the nmore so because you are planning to get married relatively soon.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: ~Wings~ | 2006/07/24

Dear friend

I too have shared the same experience as yourself, except I told my mother when my brother (who had just come out of the army) molested me when I wanted to play a game with him...I was 5.

To this day however, no matter how liberal and open I believe my relationship is with my mother its never ever been bought up and it's very sad because the only thing she's ever said is that I need to come to terms with it and heal.

While its all very well to point fingers at our midguided parents, I believe knowing that your son could do this to your daughter is a very hard pill to swallow.

My sister who is 22 today in fact, didn't even have a clue what I was talking about when I mentioned that I had been going through a transistion period involving that horrible day.
I had always thought it was out in the open, and especially so as my sister and I pretended to have sex without our panties on due to my experience 2 years earlier....I have never EVER forgiven myself for allowing something like that as an older sister (which in retrospect was because we had learned about prostitution and I was re-enacting with her)

Be strong and if your parents never manage to pucker up the courage to talk to you then make sure you have peace in your heart knowing that you told them and that you're moving forward. Anger isn't an emotion, when you get to the bottom of the anger you feel to your brother, you'll find a lot of betrayal, humiliation and resentment that you were taken advantage of.

Much love and good luck


Reply to ~Wings~
Posted by: Buzzzzzzzz | 2006/07/24

I see there is another nic with the name Buzz, sorry wasn't my intention of copying you - It is my first time on this site

Reply to Buzzzzzzzz
Posted by: Riana | 2006/07/24

Wow, that was a big step you took coming here.

I dont understand why parents do not believe their children. Its hars i think.

Anyway, i hope you find the answers and words you are looking for to tell your fiance.

I pray for you!

Reply to Riana

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