Posted by: EL | 2008/09/07

Miss my husband!

Wow, it' s been three weeks since I' ve seen my husband! I feel like crying, but I can' t cry anymore. I feel like screaming, but I' d rather not. I don' t want to go to sleep, because everytime I wake up the nightmare starts all over again. I miss him so much, I wish I didn' t miss him, but that' s impossible! I resent myself for who I was! I know I' ve done many things wrong, but was it really that bad to deserve losing my husband forever?! He sees himself as a way out for me, because I have to raise another man' s child on my own, he was not a way out for me, I really loved him and still do and maybe forever! I have sort of accepted that he doesn' t want me anymore, but at times I feel so weak. I just desperately need a hug from him, I feel like throwing a tantrum like a child because I can' t get it!

I' m so greatful for this forum just to talk about my feelings every now and then. Thanks CS!

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Our expert says:
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Mmm. Sometimes crying helps, sometimes it doesn't. Don't concentrate on blaming your self for whatever happened in the past ( as the past can be changed ) --- what IS useful, though, is to work out what is worth learning from whatever went wrong, so as to ensure it doesn't happen again. And don't blame yourself for decisions HE made. We often don't get what we want, but that needn't stop us from working towards other ways of reaching similar goals.

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