Posted by: Just Wondering | 2005/11/26

Meeting People

Hi. I would like to hear any ideas anyone may have about meeting other gay people if you are not ready to come out. I am still in school and I don't think it would be the best idea to come out now although I am totally okay with myself. I find myself hanging out with only straight (Or those I assume to be straight) people. I need to know how to meet other guys like me. Not necesscarily for dating but just to be friends. Someone who I could actually have a meaningful conversation with and not have to pretend to think the girl at school is hot when I am actually looking at her boyfriend.

Any ideas?

Thanx! :-)

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Hi Just Wondering and thanks for posting here.

Address the issue of your coming out before you try to meet other gay people - why would gay people want to meet you when you're pretending to be straight? You don't need to come out to the entire world in one 'big bang' - surely you can come out to at least one friend?

There are gay venues in many cities and some towns in South Africa. Call the Gay & Lesbian Helpline on (021) 4 222 500 any day between 1pm and 9 pm and ask the counsellor on duty for a venue near you.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Shaun | 2005/11/27

Oh my goodness you are still so young... ;-) But I understand what you are feeling. Its always just best to come out! To stop hiding yourself to the world! You can never be happy if you are not true to yourself! BUT you should feel comfy to come out, and I am not gonna go on like my mother now.. hee hee. Maybe you could chat on a site like GAYDAR with guys your age, ok but if you are still in school then you cannot be at the legal age of 19. Hmmm, maybe you should find a site on the Net for gay teenagers, I am sure you will find lots. Start chatting with guys, and when you ready you can get together for coffee, movies etc. Just make sure that you always meet someone you are chatting with in PUBLIC, in a busy mall or something like that... Go to a Coffee shop ...... Good luck. And let us know how it goes.... Love & Lipstick

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