Our expert says:
He is not being an adult in keeping his Ex as a sort of spare tyre in case things don't work out with you --- and is she really happy with that role ? It doesn't sound at all as if he is genuinely committed to getting thibngs to work out well between you.
What may worry him is not whether you have INTENTIONS of hurting him --- you had no such intentions before, but you did hurt him.
Maybe if, despite trying so hard, it doesn't seem to be working, it could be that relationship counselling would help, because you might be working so hard, but at the wrong thing. ( IF your car has run out of petrol, no amount of polishing the windscreen, no matter how hard you work at it, will get the car running again ).
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