Posted by: me | 2009/08/21


i am struggling to have the attitude of a grown up. i am childish in the true meaning of it.i talk like a child when i need something or attention.i fiddle.i realised that after my parents death i used to get alot of attention when being a child.these habits havent died of as i am 28 years old now and have been told by many that i behave like a child of which i know its true.people become nicer towards me and still think of me as cute and young if i do that than i can get what i want. i run like a child i still kind of think i am a kid for some reason.maybe my attention seeking habit is causing me to be like this i dont father when i was small never gave me attention as a child and my friends always neglected me.i am still struggling with this attitude. Is there something i can do to change this habbit. i know as much that my father loved me and maybe had more important things to deal with and that i shouldnt beat myself up but i really need to get rid of this childish attitude.pls take me through of what is happening to me and how i can overcome it without cbt because i have been there.i want you to tell me. how does somebody like me stop this childish behaviour because people dont think of me as a grown up they think of me as somebody who needs to be cared for all the time and not taken seriously and it hurts.
thank you

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Interesting observation. If you are aware of this, you can change it. You must be aware that it is annoying and probably less effective than just asking, like an adult. Maybe right now it seems to work, and some people may think it's cute, but you're close to the point at which it will be seen as grotesque and highly annoying ( ever seen the movie Whatever Happned to Baby Jane ? ) I'm sure your father did love you, buty some people, especially men, find it very hard to show love to others.
I'm surprised you wish to avoid CBT --- if you've tried it without luck ( or maybe you never mentioned this bad habit ) then maybe you saw someone who just wasn't very good at doing it right.
Work on this with the right person, and with your own good motivaion, and you can start to enjoy being adult and being taken seriously

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