Posted by: LULLU | 2007/03/05


I've been married for just over 6 months and we lived together for more than a year before we got married. On Sunday afternoon my husband, who was very reserved the whole morning came to me and said that he does not think that marraige is for him and that we are just not compatible. This came as a complete shock to me as we up to that point had a nice relaxing weekend and the weeks running up to this, we had a great time together. Yes, we've had a couple of fights, but nothing big. He says he feels crowded and wants more time to go out with his friends. Now, I do not mind him going out with firends, but there should be limits! My biggest problem is however that whenever I ask him if we could go out, even for a movie his answer is always that he is tired and not in the mood to go to a crowded place - going to a crowded bar with friends seems not to matter?

How can I get through to him without sounding like the nagging wife? I love him and want my marraige to work, but he refuses to change - claiming that he is who he is and he can't change that.

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Our expert says:
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Its surprising that it apparently took him 18 months to decide that mariage is not for him. Maybe he is too immature to share his life with someone --- but again, why would it take him so long to figure that out ? Maybe he is developing some other activity or relationship ? Could you persuade him that marriage counselling can be much cheaper than divorce ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Echelle | 2007/03/05

Nothing you say or do will change this idiot's mind!

Ignore him and go stay at your parent's house - he will soon know that you never know what you had until you've lost it! He will come crawling back to you! Be strong and let him go - if he comes back to you it was meant to be, if he doesn't, it never was!

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