Our expert says:
Dear Softy. Maybe about the holiday issue, she is just expressing (perhaps rather clumsily and tactlessly ) her opinion, which is different from yours, and maybe you are both forgetting that we're all entitled to opinions, but not to impose ours on other people. Your decsion to refresh yourself with a good holiday and let the kids enjoy themselves with their Dad, is perfectly understandable and commendable --- go and enjoy it with a clear conscience.
maybe she is manipulative, though that isn't contained in what you describe --- she sounds as if she has ben enviably Lucky in life so far, and it may well feel very unfair that she manages to succeed even without great effort, where blameless others fail. Is the anger you at times feel for her because of things she has done to hurt you, or because she's so damned successful and happy ( which can be infuriating to those of us less consistently lucky !). ?
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