Posted by: Tom | 2009/08/10

Male emotion

I am a 62 year old male &  for most of my adult life I have found that I am moved to tears very easily. Really sad matters e.g deaths or injuries to loved ones I can understand but the reality of my situation is that I even shed tears watching a sad movie or listening to a beautiful piece of music. I sometimes compare myself to a " girl"  in this respect although in no other way am I the least bit effeminate and am certainly not gay. I am happily married and still enjoy an active sex life with my wife. I mention this only because I am expecting a number of comments re being a " sissy"  or gay!

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Our expert says:
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Some of us just are more easily moved, emotionally, both by sad and by beautiful things. It's no especially gender-related, though traditionally such emotionality would be expected of women --- I have in my time known some remarkably hard-boiled women and some tender and readily upset men. And the "emotional" men are usually no less manly in other ways. It doesn't go along with other "effeminate" traits or behaviours at all. The sort of stereotypes you refer to are indeed common, and mistaken. Some "gaY" men, in terms of their sexual orientation, are excessively butch in appearance and behaviour, and some have proved both brave and capable in war, which is not the prerogative of the heterosexual. On the other hand, being a hairdresser or fashion designed is often assumed to be a gay or sissy profession, and while some men fit the sterotype, some are aggressively heterosexual womanizers.
Coming back to the emotionality question. If this has been a life-long pattern it is normal, and only inconvenient, perhaps, on some occasions. If it is of recent onset, like any other major change in one's responses and behaviours, it might indicate a number of other sources of a recent disturbance in one's equilibrium.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Kay in Gtown | 2009/08/10

Good for you, Tom! You' re a rare soul, especially here in South Africa with alll " die manne" , and your wife is a lucky woman...
All the best.

Reply to Kay in Gtown

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