Our expert says:
I can't help wondering here whether everyone involved, and commenting, are working with the same definitions of "love" ?
You "love" man 2, but have no excitement when you think of him ; you "love" man # 1, but he is emotionally unavailable and doesn't seem to love you. Sounds almost as though you feel more attracted to men who are not attracted to you, and vice versa.
So he had an unhappy childhood - maybe you'd feel pity or sympathy, but why "love" ? All his self-inflicted dramas - alarm, maybe, appropriately, but "love" ? In some ways, you seem to be enjoying the creation of some of these dramas
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