Posted by: Missy H | 2009/08/16

Love not going my direction - what am i doing wrong?

Just came out of the 4 yr r/ship which was full of lies and deceit.On the 3rd yr i find out that he was married, i regret not breaking up back then because what happened after that nearly costed me my life.Didn' t date for 10 mnths and then started dating at the beginning of July after knowing him for about 2 mnths, met him in the flight (he is a flight attendant) after so many attempts of getting my number we met again in the party then we exchanged number and been talked eversince, he then asked me to be his July date and i agreed. What happened next was more of a honeymoon then on Thursday when i called him on the phone he was funny and ended up cutting it when i called back he didn' t answer. On friday i called and he said he will call me after work and explain everything and even send me an sms saying he loves me blah blah blah, he never did and yesterday i called but he did not answer and 5 hours later his friend calls me with his phone saying i must not disturb his friend since he is with his girlfriend - added by saying " when a guy sleeps with you it doesn' t necassarily mean they love you but at the same time i must not think that all guys are dogs" .

I need help, I' m starting to think there is something wrong with me - at the same time i don' t know what i did wrong.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Gosh, it took 3 years before you found out he was already married ? Sounds as though you were left feeling lonely and instead of protecting your vulnerability, you rushed into a new relationship without the degree of care and cauion you needed and deserved. It sounds as though the second guy was a hel who lied to you and simply used you. Maybe a counsellor could help you to learb to be more discerning next time round, and to avoid letting yourself be exploited.
You were trusting and incautious ; a counsellor could helpm you be more cautious, to prevent being used like that again, but without being too cautious so as to miss out on potentially pleasing relationships in the future

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Rob | 2009/08/18

Miss H i think u need to take it easy for a while and have fun before you give out your heart fully. am single and have been in such bull and am talking it easy till i find some1 who want a serious relationship like i do.

Reply to Rob
Posted by: Missy H | 2009/08/16

I thought i waited long enough b4 jumping into the next one and i can admit that in r/ships i have a problem of overstrusting and overloving. As for the counselling i always know what i need to do but the problem is always implementing it.

Reply to Missy H

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