Posted by: Chellie | 2004/10/18

Love Confusion

Hi there,

I feel so depressed i dont actually know what to do anymore. The thing is i met this absolutely great guy and he went to visit his parents last weekend in Cape town. When he got back on Monday he had some bad news that his parents made him a offer to go and work for them and to study part time in Cape Town. We dont know each other that well and i already developed some real feelings for him and i cant expect from him to stay with me but on the other side i do want him to stay in JHB. Please give advise on how to handle this problem. He feels like my soul mate and i really dont know what to think and feel anymore.

Thanks alot!!!!

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Our expert says:
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Dear Chellie,

I am sure that it has made you feel very sad that someone you are becoming close to is going to potentially move away. Ultimately the only person that can make the decision is the guy himself, and the reasons for leaving, if he does, will be many and not because he doesn’t want to be with you.

What is important for you is that you tell him how you feel, because if you don’t you will always wonder what might have happened if you didn’t tell him. He can then be open with you about the decisions he needs to make, because I am sure it is not an easy decision for him either to consider relocating.

What is important to remember is that whilst you do have very strong feelings for him right now, if things don’t work out and he needs to leave you will find happiness with others at a later stage. Of course you can’t just transfer your feelings onto someone else, and it will take time. But speak with him first, and go from there.

Best wishes

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Our users say:
Posted by: Chellie | 2004/10/18

I am 19 years old. I know i'm stil young but i dont think i'll ever meet such a guy again not in this world.

Reply to Chellie
Posted by: Too | 2004/10/18

How old are you

Reply to Too

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