Posted by: sarah | 2005/07/01

Lost interest

i have lost interest in my long term relationship of 11yrs, should we go for councelling or what can we do?

my boyfriend is 33 and im 32 and we have a 3yr old son.
im working and he is not working. he lost his job in jan 2004 and at one time last year he told me that he is not interested in applying for jobs.

now he wants us to marry cos his prevous employer promised him a job. but i feel that he has to pay his debts first and save money for lobola and other things.

he is a good guy, but what really frustrates me is when he does not talk and i hear things from other people ---like when stores call because hes owing.

i would like to save the relationship cos theres a baby. what can i do?

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Why not go for counselling ? It could only help. Anything to do with his previous employer sounds like a daft reason for getting married before the proper preparations have been made, and before he gets a job.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Male23 | 2005/07/01

Hi Sarah, i think you should tell him to get a job first before you even think to marry him, because i'm worried about the part where you say he does not care anymore to apply for a new job.
If you love him, stay with him and help him, but dont carry all his weight, just be there for him. Tell him you will marry him, but only once its financial safe to o so (not because you're after his money) but hay...there is a kid to support.

And before you marry him, make sure all the stories you've heard is sorted out first.

Good luck Sarah!

x x x

Reply to Male23

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.