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Question
Posted by: Minty | 2004/11/08

Lost and Confused

I am so lost, confused and feeling very lonely. My boyfriend left 8 months ago to Cameroon (Home) and i met another guy we've been going out for the past few months and i don't get as much attention i need, he's always with friends and sometimes home. He's got financial problems and starting a new bussiness which i sometimes think maybe he sometimes needs to be alone. But whenever i call him to come and see me it takes him time to come and whever he comes doesn't spend enough time with me and now i've reach a point where i think i need to end this relationship.
I love this guy so much that this hurts me a lot. I am happy whenever i'm with him but as soon as he leaves i get angry and start hating myself and thinking i'm being taken for fool.

Please advise me as to what to do.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Hi MInty,
This new guy doesn't sound all that secure as a bf, does he ? Don't get yourself involved in his financial problems, as you don't need to share those. I'm puzzled as to what sort of love you feel for a guy who you also feel neglects you, and who makes you so angry. maybe you bounced into this relationship with him on the rebound, after losing your last bf when he wnet home ? Why not end it, if you think that's best for you ? Surely you could do better ?
And you talk of loving him, but you don't talk convincingly of him loving you, and one-way love isn't good enough for you.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Zee | 2004/11/08

I ve been in a situation like that, and its truly frustrating. My advice is to DUMP him. It may hurt for a littlle while, but you be fine with time. I got someone very nice, who would die to have me around. We connect at all levels, and problems we have are for other things, not r/ships.

I truly think u should let it go, give urself time to heal, start going out with friends and enjoy urself. U ll get someone u ll like, I assure you

Reply to Zee

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