Our expert says:
Sorry that wo of the counsellors didn't work well with you, and sorry too that the girl had apparently such highly unrealistic expectations from you, indeed from any partner. Don't let it dent your self-esteem. Now, you know we can't, for various excellent reasons, keep track of all therapists or recommend any specific shrink. Your concept sounds right, but alas there's no easy way to discover a good therapist, and then amongst those, the one thagt will "clicl" best with you, other than trial and error. Pity there's not some variety of computer-dating service to match therapist and client !
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