Posted by: Marie | 2008/07/31

Lonely beyond words - 51 year old female

Can any of your readers perhaps suggest what does a 51 year old lady do in this town/country to get into a decent, kind and wonderful friendship? Two of my children live overseas, the other in another city with his girlfriend. I have no other family at all and was made redundant a few years ago and just cannot get work it seems for all the reasons which other people know who have also gone this route in this day and age.<br>I am average looking, No miss world but not hit with the ugly stick either. Love to cook. Love going on walks, Read a great deal - fiction and non fiction. Love dancing, music, laughing, interesting discussions - consider myself a humanitarian and am involved in 3 voluntary organizations but everyone there is either married or simply looking for someone to cheat with. <br><br>Things have been getting so bad that while I keep on a cheery face for the world to see, I am actually highly suicidal as I just cannot imagine living this way for many more years to come. I have done it for 7 years since my partner passed away and just cannot deal with this loneliness any longer. <br>Anyone with ideas can reply to me - I am such a social person, this is killing me!<br>

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Many others are in a similar situation, and it can indeed be worrying --- but don't despair, and if you find yourself contemplating suicide, you could be Depressed as well, and deserving proper treatment for that. Maybe explore the Anxiety/Depression Support Group, too. From the sound of it, numerous other readers right here experience similar concerns --- maybe think of forming a mutual support group to work on this jointly ?

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: same here | 2008/08/03

again I repeat: I do not need to get together with other women, so emailing you Marie would not help a single bit. I need someone to love and kiss and hold and fall asleep in their arms - and that would not be you...

Reply to same here
Posted by: Marie | 2008/08/02

I just keep on wondering why oh why are people SO apathetic in life? I came on here, I put up my post, yup, was a bit sneaky and managed to get a address in there and though people bemoan the fact that they are so alone and would *love* to have company (REALLY?) then how come not one single person has reached out and written to the address I posted.
Sheesh, I don' t know....makes no sense to me at all......

Reply to Marie
Posted by: Penny | 2008/08/01

I also no how u feel iv been alone 14years when hubby pased away devoted alll my time to bringing up 2 kids, now it seems they just use you ti help iut financially or to babysit, dont do single clubs and yes most men think oh shame lady is deparate, and wants to have a affair then run home to wifey not for me thanks, and yr lady friends u had before dont come around or dont invite u around cause they scared there hubbies will stray very scary, Life Sucks at 54years really sad

Reply to Penny
Posted by: same here | 2008/08/01

I do have female friends, I don' t need to get together. I am lonely romantically....

Reply to same here
Posted by: Kelly | 2008/08/01

Well i think the thing to do here is for all you women to get together and become friends since u guys are all lonely.
Enjoy each others company.

Reply to Kelly
Posted by: Marie | 2008/07/31

Any of the above ladies want to get in touch with me? I tried to leave my addy but it was wiped off but let me be sneaky (hopeful) and try again...write to c o l t a o u at g m a i l d o t c o m

If this does not work - does anyone else have any smart ideas how we can bypass this address issue? I would so love to be in touch with someone in a similar situation to myself....

Reply to Marie
Posted by: Same here | 2008/07/31

I am 29 and dating an a**hole just to keep the loneliness away. I tell myself that he is a place-holder until something real comes along. But deep down I shiver as I think of the next 30 years of loneliness. And please no one must tell me to find a hobby or use the time alone to find myself. I know myself, I don' t need to find myself and I have hobbies to keep me busy during the day - but at night I go home to an empty house and sleep alone in a huge bed.

Reply to Same here
Posted by: Anon | 2008/07/31

You are not the only one, I am 30 years old and only have my child to keep me company. Sometimes I crave for adult company over weekends but it seems that I repel people because no one ever comes near me and by nature I' m a very friendly person. It really depresses me and sometimes I think that dying is the best thing but I have a child to think about, Ive given up and realised that I will never find Mr. Right because men always cheat on me. Life is not good anymore.

Reply to Anon
Posted by: Emma | 2008/07/31

Hi Marie,

I know just how you feel. I am also 51 and I live alone. I go to work each day and back home. No one to talk to or to spend time with on weekends. Especially now that petrol is so expensive and money is an issue I have to stay home. Been alone for 4 years, also finding it very hard to deal with.

Reply to Emma

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