Posted by: anja | 2004/10/04

Living with Bi-polar disorder

I was diagnosed with bi-polar disorder 4 months ago and have not told my parents yet. they have never understood why i do what i do and think it's because i'm selfish or something they did wrong. i finally have a name for this monster that lives inside me. i wish i could de-tach the emotional part of my brain. i don't know who to talk to because the medication isn't helping me. a while ago i got up one morning and took an overdose of tranquilisers just to get through the day. how stable is that for a 28 year mother of two?

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Our expert says:
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anja, isn't it high time that you DID tell your parents, especially if they haven't understood the seriousness of your condition, and as your doctor can confirm the diagnosis ? It is helipful to have a name for the monster, isn't it ?
Overdoses are never a good idea, especially when you have children to care for. See your psychiatrist and work on canging and varying the medicines ( there's quite a range available now ) to find the combination that best suits you. And see a counsellor, to talk through things, which can help you to feel a whole lot better.
As listener points out, different effects of the meds take differing times to work through and become available fully. And helpful advice, based on real experience, from Lonestar, too

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Our users say:
Posted by: anja | 2004/10/05

Thank you for the response.
I decided yesterday to tell my parents, don't know how though. How do you tell someone that your day can start with so much energy and positive exhuberance just to crash and burn, cry and despair by noon?
My children can't understand why mommy's never the same. I feel completely incompetent and paranoid and there's no-one to talk to or that understand. This pretending to be fine and keeping appearances up ,barely getting through the day is getting too much for me. I HATE FEELING LIKE THIS!

Reply to anja
Posted by: Lonestar | 2004/10/04

You'll be suprised how treatable this condition is, off course with the correct medication. As for myself, I am BP too and was diagnosed about (oh gosh I cannot remember) 4 years ago, I think. Anyway, know the feeling with the family, mine also thought it was something I read up on the internet and dragged onto the table. Give them enough time to adapt and speak about BP as you go along learning more about it yourself.

I give my family just enough info to digest at one time. If you feed them too much, they'll suffer from indigestion. Just go with the flow. Life is a ball (yes I know, Lonestar had here moments before- but don't we all) and enjoy your children. I live for mine!!

Welcome to the forum and keep on posting.

Reply to Lonestar
Posted by: listener | 2004/10/04

Hang in there. I know quite a bit about mental illnesses. Your medication takes a while to kick in. Just make sure you drink the meds every single not skip any meds, whatever you do. You will see, your bipolar condition is treatable and what a nice surprise it will be to your fams when you handle your stressess etc in a much better way.
Go back to phsychiatrist and tell him it is not doing it for you. They have to chop and change anyway until they find the right one. It is trial and error. If you dont try and sort your condition out, it will become worse and worse and you will be living in hell as well as making it hell for others.

Reply to listener

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