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Question
Posted by: miss | 2004/11/18

living tog

My situation is as follows: my b/f and I have been going out for almost a year. We dated for about 2 months and then he moved in with me for 8 months. In that time we bought a house together to move into in April '05. However, the place we live in is only 1 b/room and we just got under each others feet, I felt like a housewife and the romance went out the window. Beginning of October he moved out, to ease this problem. However, we still do not get along as we did in the beginning. Today, I heard our house that we were supposed to move into next year has been cancelled. Is this a sign / fate or what? Is this God's way of not allowing us to live together again? I am so disappointed.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

In the old days people often waited far too long before moving on to the next step. But if you move in together after only 2 months, you probably don't know each other well enough to know if this could work out in the long term. And deciding to buy a house together in the earliy months, again before you know whether the two of you will be compatible over the long term, is rash. As you discovered, living together is far more difficult that most folks imagine, and sex is usually the easier part of it. When it gets down to who takes out the rubbish, who squeezes the toothpaste tube at the bottom, etc., romance can be hard to maintain.
It doesn't sound as if you two were really compatible --- move on, look more widely, and don't rush it next time.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Mona | 2004/11/19

I agree with Kernel, the size of the place doesnt matter, you obviously werent meant for each other. Him moving out was the sign. Move on, find someone else.

Reply to Mona
Posted by: Kernel | 2004/11/19

What are you dissapointed about? Him moving out, the house been cancelled or the missing romance?

Anyway - he got the taste of what married life with you would be and I think he is not ready for it. If the two of you can't live together in a 1 b/r flat for more than 8 months, I doubt that you could live together anywhere for the rest of your lives.

Start looking for a new boyfriend and don't move in together after 2 months.

Reply to Kernel
Posted by: Dude | 2004/11/19

wicked ow whun presented wiv a story of freedom and dig one excels but bein people and livin togetha in every day life brings about a change in environment and dat effects ones wicked vibes. maybe yous should check dis experience as a learnin one in which yous can establish wot life would be dig should yous geezers end up married or somethin. yous need a lot of dig these days to get through da wicked stuff and keep smilin... if yous can't make it dig dis thun wot does dat tell yous

Reply to Dude
Posted by: Edmund | 2004/11/19

Hi "Miss"

No it is not a sign from God - it might just be something you have considered without wanting to admit it. Looking for reasons when Life happens would only make you the most unbearable person to life with. Tackle your problems as partners and dont forget to listen and communicate.

Most of the time we worry 90% about a problem that only has a 10% chance of happening.

Kind Regards
Edmund

Reply to Edmund

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