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Question
Posted by: sizzy | 2007/04/10

life being so cruel

i am 33 year old woman, i have no man and no kids, actually never had a luck in the dating. i keep on meeting cheating guys, there was never a relationship in my life where i had a man who put his focus on me always i will find out that there is another woman somewhere.
All my friends are happily married with kids all over the show, i have attended my friends baby shower, but this nowadyas i am not keen to even attend those because when i get there i just feel lost, low self esteem and insecure.
What i have notice is i develop a jelous to such an extent that if my friends announce that they are pregnant i think of my self and the lonely life that i am leaving then i will be so depressed for weeks.
i am actually withdrawing from most of them and i am worried that i will end up alone in this world, with no kids, no man and no friends as i feel like i am falling behind.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

I like anon's response. DO see a counsellor, preferably of the CBT form, to work on your self-confidence and self-esteem, and to discover the benefits of enjoying what you have and planning reasonably for what more you want, rather thasn becoming preoccupied with what you don't have ( yet ).

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: sizzy | 2007/04/11

thanks very much for the advise, i sometimes think the same way as u guys are saying, but there are days were i just feel so down about myself and i do try to convince myself that things will be ok but still feel like i should just cry loud.

Reply to sizzy
Posted by: Gee | 2007/04/11

Every pot has its own lid, your time is not God's time, enjoy life with your friends, family, make the best of your career, earn money, buy things that you like, go out with friends. The right man will come when the time is right, don't stress about it, i have seen women getting married at their late 40's and early 50's, you are still young girl, your man is coming.

Reply to Gee
Posted by: :) | 2007/04/10

forgoodness sake your 33!!!!not 83!!!!

Next time, go for a guy that you not attracted too, cause you seem to fall for the CHEATERS! try reversing the process, if you find him awful(not too repelling, just okay) , give him a go...variety girl! cheer up plenty of time for the preggy thing , your life sounds ....ok so far , except for THE BLUES!

Reply to :)
Posted by: anon | 2007/04/10

Dear Sizzy

Perhaps you should stop focussing on what you don't have in your life but what you do have. Focus on the positives, write down all the good things and what you are thankful for in your life.

You also have to ask yourself the question why are you attracting these type of men in your life. What signals are you sending out there. Do you have thoughts in your mind that you are not good enough, there must be something wrong with you, negative self talk, doubts, fear etc.

If you want to change something you have to change the way you are thinking. You seem to manifest in your life what you don't want and not want you want.

I would suggest you write down all the character traits of a man you wish you attract into your life. Focus on all the good things, believe in yourself, be happy with what you have and with yourself. Once you are truly happy within you will find the right person.

Suggest perhaps some counselling will help you, if you are unable to work on yourself.

By isolating yourself, withdrawing and having all these negative emotions of jealousy etc, is not helping you in any way.

If you feel that you are going into a depression, see a Dr and have it treated as well as psychotherapy.

Take care of yourself and remember to be kind to yourself. Try and be your own best friend.

Reply to anon

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