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Question
Posted by: Sue | 2006/04/11

Lewe Leeg!

Hi Doc
raar ma waar, Ouers was baie eng, en nie oor seks gepraat nie ek was in st 10 toe ek v d 1ste keer omgang gehad het, en ook swanger geword het, ouers het my weggejaag uit huis, & aangedring ons moet trou, na 11jr is ons geskei, 2 pragtige seuns uit huwelik, ek het seuns alleen groot gemaak v 12jr, ons het by tye baie swaar gekry, ek het verder gestudeer, graad gekry, baie goeie werk so 5jr terug gekry, seuns nou n jaar uit huis, in al die tyd nie weer n vaste verhouding gehad nie, ek is nou 43jr en bevoorreg om nogals aantreklik te wees,wat is fout met my?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

A rather common situation, Sue ! Isn't it sad that so many parents seem to think that they're protecting their kids from something by never talking about sex, when its often the kids who know less about sex, that go in for hazardous experinmentation, and who get pregnant at the wrong time. And then they blame you, for the result of their own insistence on not allowing you to know what it was all about. Ech ! Under very difficult circumstances, you have done very well and deserve congratulations for all you have achieved. If there's something wrong with you, I rather wish the same thing was wrong with an awful lot of other people !

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Phoenix | 2006/04/12

Sue, if you are fortunate enough to be "nogals aantreklik" then make yourself available for a relationship. Remember, it pays to advertise as they say in marketing. Do not depend on blind dates, friends or family introducing you to someone, etc. The probabilties are always way low that you meet the right person quickly. Try the internet (reputable type) dating sites. I made it work for me and quickly (after a few months). It brings you into contact with a large variety of potential partners. You can at least assess them to a certain extent before choosing to meet them. Yes, there will be some disappointments and duds but there are also decent individuals searching, just like you. Of course, if one is stupidly naive then you can be taken advantage of, but this can happen just as easily to a person every day in all walks of life. One's forties can be very rewarding. So go for it!

Reply to Phoenix
Posted by: Aletta | 2006/04/11

Ek stem saam met CS en Phil, Sue, maar ek hoor dat jy leeg en af voel. Miskien die "empty nest" ding na die seuns uit die huis is?
Nou is die tyd om na jouself te begin kyk - kry iets waarin jy belangstel en maak werk daarvan om jou daarin uit te leef, sluit by klubs/verenigings/ens aan. Jy sal vriende maak en mense ontmoet wat in dieselfde dinge belangstel as jy.
Ek was ook in jou situasie, en 'n mens leef so in die dag-tot-dag stryd dat jy jouself verloor. Soek net, jy is nog daar binne, en jy skuld jouself nou 'n bietjie aandag en plesier.
sterkte!

Reply to Aletta
Posted by: PHIL | 2006/04/11

Daar is absoluut niks fout met jou behalwe dat jy 'n besonderse mens is. Jy is 'n wenner, 'n baie sterk persoon. Jy behoort jouself op die skouer te tik en trots te voel!
Ek share van jou gevoelens, maar jy is inspirasie en bewys vir ander dat as 'n mens "wil"...kan jy!

Philip

Reply to PHIL

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