Posted by: Tantric | 2007/06/11

leaving the SA wat am I going 2 miss?

this past weekedn my partner got an offer to move to San Diego to play football he asked me to move there with and as his wife, i agreed but now the reality is sinking cause i have to quit my job, leave my family out of all my mothers children i have always been close to home or at home. now the changes are kind of frightening i have five months to sort out my life paying off my car quitting my job, theres a promise of a job, living arrangements and lots of benefits. guys i love South Africa besides crime and politics it has the best, what do u luv bout South Africa?

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Our expert says:
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Not a question for a shrink, butn I'm sure our other readers will have useful comments. So often in life, we meet this sort of combination of challenges and opportunities.

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Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2007/06/11

Tantric the question is will you be able to work there. Will you be able to get a work permit???

Another question is do you want to marry this man, if you are not as yet married?

About adjusting in another country, see it as an exciting challenge. You obviously are young, being young and relocating is much easier as you have not ties. Once you have children it would be more difficult as you would have to relocate them to schools, etc.

There are so many expats wherever you go, that you will be able to link up with a group near you.

Hey take the plunge and enjoy!!!

Reply to anon
Posted by: ToeKnee | 2007/06/11

Let the baby be born there. He/she will thank you one day.

Reply to ToeKnee
Posted by: tantric | 2007/06/11

we are looking at a one year contract first and seeind whether or not if we can live there the contract offered for three years i am a home girl till i die i love everything music, biltong braais, al sports matches man you name the places we go to. i would love to leave for a while and see what its like out there i also decided to return home if i fall preggies and stay there till i am five months so my baby can be south african i just love this place.
heres a question how many languages a day do you get exposed to and which african language can you speak besides english or afrikaans

Reply to tantric
Posted by: Earl | 2007/06/11

LickyGlove - crime in da US is just as bad if not worse than here in SA.... remember that US is far larger then SA and it will look as if there is less crime but it is not so.... the kids in US are on drugs from ages 10 and they tend to become sexually active earlier then our kids as well. Have you read how many peadophiles they have there? Do yourself a favour and watch the Crime and Investigation channel on DSTV channel 69.... they dont sleep with 1 eye open, they sleep with guns under their pillows.

Reply to Earl
Posted by: joey | 2007/06/11

I think its great to go to another country if you have an opportunity to do it - its a great experience. Remember though - even though you might feel that you're on your own in this country - when you move to another country you're actually an outsider - its not yours - you are not part of it. Home is home, wherever that might be. I found the most difficult thing was that I did'nt feel that I belonged and I yearned for home and the feeling that I was part of SA and I belonged here - you only feel like this if you go overseas. If you're there long enough though you will become part of that country - just takes quite a few years.

Reply to joey
Posted by: LickyGlove | 2007/06/11

Another thing you must remember, the US is a nanny state. You can't drunk drive, jaywalk, speed, etc like we can here. We might not have governemnt here but it's a good thing, we are not over-regulated. Also you are going to pay dearly to have a gardener and maid.

But ont he other hand: you won't have to look over your shoulder when you leave your house, or sleep with one eye open like you have to do here. I think htere they still repsect the police and each other..

Reply to LickyGlove
Posted by: Tsk | 2007/06/11

SA has lovely scenery and lets face it the people are very friendly. Despite all the other k*k we have a great country that we can be proud of. Our heritage makes us who we are and the world loves us :) Follow your man but come back!

Reply to Tsk
Posted by: muffin | 2007/06/11

I have lived in the states for 3 years . mostly it was nice, the people were friendly, but, the schools are awful, the children have no respect, you miss your family and friends a lot, it is never the same as at home..and then there's George Bush. Then on the other side, why not give it a go, if you don't like it you can always come back, a little change of scenery is always a nice thing, it broadens your mind a lot

Reply to muffin
Posted by: ToeKnee | 2007/06/11

Tantric .. do it. I am looking at moving to the States too. I'd rather put up with the yanks than the crime and lack of government here. I also would like to experience a first world country for a while. Yes, I'll miss my friends and family but one has to look out for number 1.

Reply to ToeKnee
Posted by: pp | 2007/06/11

Hi Tantric I did the same thing a few years back and the biggest thing I missed was the friendly south african people and the well mannered youth that we have here and a general lack of a yob culture yes we have the crime and if this gov can ever get to grips with that we are in paradise compared to the rest. I know I have lives there and so glad to be back SA I LOVE YOU....

Where are you Britty?????

Reply to pp
Posted by: Britty | 2007/06/11

I am not South African although I have lived there for many years but currently overseas. I miss the familiarity of everyday life in South Africa , family and friends - no-one here understands "just now".

Reply to Britty
Posted by: C. | 2007/06/11

You calling my mansion little?

Reply to C.
Posted by: Keanu | 2007/06/11

Well I should think we'd all have our own unique reasons for loving South Africa. But thats what makes it the best country in the world! The diversity and the spectrum of choices. There's not 1, 2, 3 reasons but countless reasons because SA offers something to everyone regardless of your race, gender or believe.

Normally its not the big significant things you miss about a place, person or circumstance. Its the little things that at the time might have seemed insignificant that you'll miss.

But hey I suggest you weigh up your future in terms of securtiy, opportunity, family values, love and comfort. Things can also be quite rosy abroad. There's always pros and cons.

Personally, I will not swap SA for nothing!
Good luck.

Reply to Keanu
Posted by: C. | 2007/06/11

My mansion. We won't be able to live like this for the same price overseas. Fresh water out of the taps. Cheap(ish) petrol (I read we're something like 4th or 6th on the list - top being cheapest, in the world!) I guess there's more, just can't think of them now.

Reply to C.

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