Our expert says:
Hmm. You seem fond ( temporarily at least ) of men from Eastern parts of Europe ? But at least in the last instance, not nice men. Not nice at all. Appaently this guy also lives in SA ? Why not go to a Maintenance Court, where you could I think get free legal assistance, and have it decide to require him to pay proper maintenance. And may to reconsider visitation - I don't beleieve an absent parent should get more visitation time than they can actually bother to use well, for the child's benefit.
Once it has been decided by the court, you have the law behind youj and the court could pursue him to force him to pay the agreed amounts.
If he doesn't see the boy much, I wonder how you two manage to spend enough time together to have quarrels ?
The boy knows his father and, you say, is not particularly fond of him ( understandably ) - I see no reason to prod him towards seeking more contact with an uncaring dad. There is no magical benefit for a child from contact with an uncaring parent. If when he gets into his teens, he wants to contact the dork, he will be able to do so.
And of course another potential advantage of having the child's rights set by the court, is that he will have to provide the court with proper accurate contact details and residential address.
Meanwhile, keep up you own excellent work in raising your children well.
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