Posted by: Gen | 2006/10/25

Issue/distrusting of Friends

I don't want friends, and am scared of making new friends, also, a friend, which was our best friend (Myne and my husbands) wants to be back in our lives again, and I am scared. My husband says I must stop being a Bit**, but that's not the case at all, he doesn't understand how scared I am of having friens in my life again.

My previous croud of friends really hurt me, they backstabbed me, spread rumours behind my back that could have cost me my son.

The friend that wants back in our life also cost us a lot of trouble. Now my husband wants her back in our life and I'm scared to let her bac in...into my heart, into my life, into a friendship.

My heart races terrible just thinking about the possibility that I would have to pretend to trust someone again, and what if I do trust her, or anyone for that matter ever again? What if I get let down again?

I always thought I had some wonderful friends until I found out everything they said about me and my husband.

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Our expert says:
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Sounds like a perfect case or CBT counselling. In life we need to draw accurate and fruitful conclusions from our experiences. From the experiences you describe, it would be apt to conclude that SOME people are untrustworthy, and that it's worth learning how to assess people better and lessen the risks of trusting too much, someone who doesn't deserve to be trusted. But it is NOT appropriate to conclude that NOBODY can be trusted, and to assume thyat everyone will be a back-stabber. CBT !

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