Posted by: Ultra sensitive/ pushover | 2010/04/22

Is this happening again?

Hi, I am a professional and worked at a company for 10 years. However things became very unhappy as most of my department ganged up on me and I left. This was subsequent to me being offered a manager position. I am in a new company and happy here, but I seem to have a problem with secretaries which also happened at my previous position. They seem to have a problem taking instructions from me to the extent that it eventually leads to a confrontation. I am always nice ( i believe) as I have this need to have everyone like me but get attitude when I request something. How do I assert myself without being overbearing?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageWorkplace health expert

Could be that you ARE too sensitive to ensuring all will like you and that there inevitably may be confrontation. You appear to almost expect the secretary not to listen to you. If you are indeed the nice guy, play the role,include the other player(s) in your planning, ask for opinion suggestions - always remain the manager and be assertive when required. Be careful that your interpretation of assertion is not seen by others as aggression.

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