Our expert says:
Sounds like an odd family with problems of its own. And apparently the parents, and maybe especially the mother, wants to control his life and his choices. But overall there seems to be too much lack of communication. Its peculiar for a man not to tell his father he has become engaged, especially to someone the father knows, figuring that "the news would spread" - maybe it'd turn up on the evening TV news, but one shouldn't rely on it !
And now you feel understandably hurt about something, but you haven't told your fiance - why not ? Discuss this calmly with him. Maybe he can use th occasion of the father's birthday celebrations to have a serious talk with father and mother and sort out the ill-feeling and miscommunications. As Maria says, it high time your fiancee man's up and acts responsibly towards you and the family.
Relying on someone else noticing a change in relationship status on Facebook is plain silly, and demonstrates further why I consider the Facebook follies to be more often a cause of problems than people want to realize.
Firect, calm, clear communication can only help - it may not solve all the problems, but will at least lessen the misunderstandings and have less people guessing or assuming what might be happening.
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