Posted by: Worried and confused | 2008/11/18

Is it safe?

The messages of yesterday was really upsetting. I was so shocked by the judging and unempathetic comments regarding suicide... I have also been down the suicide road - often.

When you drown in a pool of darkness and fear takes total control... then the only way out (you can think about), is dying...

For me it is a constant fight....

Not sure whether it is a safe place to share anymore???

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its probably safer than the world outside, I do understand how shocking you found the unsympathetic messages, clearly from people who found then unusual series of suicidal message on Blue Monday morning, unduly upsetting to them, for personal reasons.
There is evidence to support the extent to which, as a depressed person becomes suicidal, their thinking becomes constricted and increasingly negative ; the notice and remember only the most negative aspects of life as they experience it or have experienced it, and don't notice or ignore any positive elements. They tend increasingly to discount postive possibilities, and "see no other way out" --- not because in reality there IS no other way out, because there are always other ways out, but because they don't SEE any alternatives.
Being aggressive towards people who feel in this way is of course cruel as well as unhelpful, as it confirms their unrealistically negative view of life. Notice how those responses demonstrate how one person's suicidal ideas actively threaten and frighten someone else, provoking in some cases the hostile responses.
But you will know, from experience that this is generally one of the safest and most supportive places to share feelings of all kinds.

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Our users say:
Posted by: anon | 2008/11/18

the opinions of these people regarding suicide is not always that they do not know how it feels or has never been in this situation, most of them have been in this situation and is most likely the one that was left behind after someone they so dearly loved commited suicide. they are the ones that had to deal with all the legal aspects, the burial, the " cleaning up"  afterwards, walking into the room finding the loved one swimming in their own blood and guts, having to explain to your children that their loved one killed himself/herself, the child thinking this is normal..... setting a standard for children. or seeing the pain in your fathers eyes as he tells you that his brother shot himself this morning, seeing the pain in the peoples eyes as they frantically look for someone and find them dead in a car full of gas, or listening to your best friend with tears in her eyes as she tells you how her mother commited suicide and now that she is grown it is ruining her life....It should not be an option. yes times are hard, very hard, but seeing this horrible way out as an option is not worth it. God is the way out!!!! No other way out is a lie from the devil!!!!!

Reply to anon
Posted by: Lin | 2008/11/18

Unfortunately you get people that judge harshly. Maybe they haven' t been in the same position before, or maybe they are just clueless. Often people that react this way is terribly uneducated about the specified topic...
Please don' t stop sharing as this is still a place where help is needed and asked for and maybe you can help someone or get some advise.

Reply to Lin

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