Our expert says:
From a distance, none of us can tell you exactly what happened. But from what you say, it sounds rather as if this uy has some difficulties handling some of the normal frictions that arise within relationships, and instead of either coping with them or seeking help . counseling to learn how to do so, he tends to end the relationship and sugest "let's be just friends" instead. I wonder whether he has done this more than the twice that you know about ?
Anyhow, there was probably no way in which you could have prevented the breakup, and you shouldn't blame yourself for this having happened. It sounds as if at least a significant part of the problem may well lie with him, and won't alter until he recognizs that there is a problem, and until he chooses to get expert counselling to overcome it. Maybe it'd be best for you to focus on starting afresh and looking towards your future, rather than towards his past.
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