Our expert says:
WHY, does he say, she is on his BBM ? Are there understandable business reasons for this ( and one would then assume that other male colleagues of his are also listed there ? )
From your comments, apparently they are, and your main concern is that he DOESN'T mention her in conversation with you.
You say he cheated on you once before so its understandable that you're suspicious.And obviously you ARE suspicious, as you have been rooting around in his phone and inspecting his messages. Maybe the fact that he allows you to do so suggests either than he has genuinely nothing to hide, or that he is content that he has erased / deleted any incriminating material.
Your gut isn't always right, but is always worth paying attention to.
Why not try to persuade him to join you in mariage counselling anyway ?
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