Posted by: Bill | 2009/09/29


Hi all, please give some ideas. My wife has never masturbated, and does not allow me to touch or use my hands down there, let alone allow me to go down on her!
I allow her to touch me anywhere, and to do as she pleases, if it pleases her then it satisfies me. To me sex is about giving pleasure not just recieving it, I feel like I have half a sex life and would appreciate some help. If my wife only knew how much pleasure and love I could give her, and how great it would be for her.... but sadly she seems to have these hangups and when we talk about it she brushes it aside and sometimes says that she will try ' one day' , but that day never comes (we have been together for almost twenty years) I think she wants to, but is either too shy or too self concious?

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Our expert says:
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its good that you have tried to speak to her about it and its even better that you care about her needs as well. i would suggest that you sit her down and explain why her satisfaction is important to you (as you've described above) and see if she would be willing to see a sexual health counsellor/sexologist who can help decrease her anxieties/inhibitions. it is important that she feels comfortable and not pressurised in the bedroom so yourl can always start with light touching etc before moving up the ladder.

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Our users say:
Posted by: jacks | 2009/10/02

i had the same prob with my girlfriend and i asked her why and insisted on a answer!what she told me is that she cant understand how we can like it as guys to do that! so i asked her if she likes doing all that to me! she said yes its awsome and i said same here!its like giving a dog a bone without him tasting it!

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Posted by: Anon | 2009/09/30

Mybe she is a she male. How do you find the anal sex?

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Posted by: kelly | 2009/09/29

I think she is just shy or maybe she finds that parts of her unattractive and therefore does not wnt you going there...

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Posted by: Egg | 2009/09/29

I understand but you have to respect her wishes in that department. If she does not want it then you cant try and convince her other wise. Just accept it.

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