Our expert says:
It is HIS heart which should be sad at recognizing that he is a lazy loser, not yours - you did not cause the situation to occur or last - HE did. With the language problems, he may well lie to them about the situation, which is why he should visit them so they can see and believe for themselves.
And it is not being horrible to make him face the situation he has created. Being too soft is enabling him to remain unwell and incompetent.
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