Posted by: Lonestar | 2004/10/07

Ice breaker

Hi all,

Well, given the events of the past two days I thought let me ask your opinion and advice on the following as it is totally different from the usual postings. As with many married couples, each year Christmas day, the family would all get together and spend some valuable time with each other. Then when parents stay far away the children would decide to be with the hubby's parents one year and the wifes the next year etc.

Now, my inlaws are forcing us to come over for Christmas, but we won't be able to go as my hubby is working night shift on that day and travelling nearly 200km there and 200km back on the same day in order for my husband to be in time for work (he can't get off that day) is out of the question.

My parents expect us to go over to my brothers house for a family meal (we did that last year too) which we don't want to do.

Also, my parents and in-laws don't get along (long story), so if the one in-laws find out that we have declined there offer and go to my parents/brother (only 14km away) all hell will break loose and vica versa.

So we have decided to go solo for that day, do our own thing, but what? I really want to make it special and get the message accross that we wont be at home and thank you for inviting us, but we have already made other plans.

Please anyone out there with ideas good enough to prevent a huge family fight - I don't need this kind of stress at all.

Thanks guys and girls...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

HEllo Lonestar,
I understans that one would want to try to make the most people happy, but travelling long distances, in a hurry, at a time of above average numbers of drunk drivers, is risky and not fun.
Can you make a pleasant issue as to why, for lack of time and wellness, you're planning a romantic and special Christmas for yourselves close to home, and just wish all the best to all the others and will see them next year ? Anf then I look and see that's just what kernel said.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Kernel | 2004/10/07

Book a Christmas dinner at a nice hotel/restaurant or even for the weekend and just tell your family that you have decided to take a break from the normal and have a solo Christmas dinner this year.

Reply to Kernel
Posted by: Emma | 2004/10/07

Hi Lonestar,

In a situation like yours, it is best to stay away from both families concerned, as you have said do your own thing. My sugestion would be to take your family out for Christmas lunch (if you can afford it). Lots of places offer special Christmas lunches. Or perhaps have a Christmas picnic somewhere away from your home....

Just make the family understand that it is your choice what your own family does on Christmas day.

Good luck.

Reply to Emma

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