Posted by: TTM | 2007/04/19

I'm sad...

I have lost someone that I felt so much for. It is over. It was more my decision than hers. I had to.....

She made me whole. I wanted her. I needed her and she could not acknowledge that and that is why I had to let go.

I can honestly say that I have loved with my soul for the first time in my life. I don't know how long it will take me to really let go of her....however...I will never let go on how love is suppose to feel like....I will never let go on how I am supposed to be treated and I will never let go of what I felt! I know what falling in love REALLY feels I just have to find out how much it is REALLY going to hurt to fall out of love again.

It is already hurting like hell. I am freakin shedding tears! This is so my fault...I've opened myself up for this and now that I know how wonderful love is...I will again and again and again....

I can't wait to find THE person. I know I will and after M I just know that I will not make the same mistakes I've made in the past. Now I KNOW! I just know that THE person will have to be a very special person....I don't think that anyone can ever replace M!

So this is me letting go....

Thank you M for what I've gained from all of this. You thought me about love, respect and who I am. You thought me that life is mostly there for us to enhance people's lifes. I am ok. I will be ok. I am just going to miss you so damn much!

Love you always!

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGay, lesbian and bisexual expert

Hi there TTM and thanks for sharing this very personal post with us. Your feelings certainly sound very raw at the moment and you need to allow yourself ample space to mourn your loss. The process of letting go is very complex and painful but it sounds as if you've commenced your journey.

There is plenty that is positive in your post – you point out that you’ve experienced love and there's a part of you that knows you'll experience it again.

I share Deeve's wish that M will read this post and I hope you’ll keep posting; I don't need to tell you that this is a very supportive space.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Jack Noir | 2007/04/19


I hope you dont think I am rude to post a reply to a very personal post like that. A line that caught my eye:
"You thought me that life is mostly there for us to enhance people's lifes."

My partner for the last 9 years has nem teaching me that and it takes a while for it to sink in, but when it does, it makes the world a place of opportunity.

Thanks for sharing this...


Reply to Jack Noir
Posted by: Deeve | 2007/04/19

Hang in there....a very personal posting that willl touch many of us. Hope 'M' reads this too, she sounds like a real special person. Guess only time will heal you both. God Bless

Reply to Deeve
Posted by: Chameleon_boy | 2007/04/19

My heart goes out to you TTM, be strong....



Reply to Chameleon_boy

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