Our expert says:
Thanks for the further information, which makes things a bit clearer. It sounds as though your only access to the kids is when you travel 400 km and stay somewhere, and see them there - apparently you don't have any access with the kids visiting you at your home ? If the latter was possible,m of course it would be possible for their father to take them to a child psychologist for assessment. I don't see why a father can't take his kids to be assessed by a doctor or simila specialist if he is worried about them. But this would be harder to achieve if it had to be done while they were staying with their mother and only briefly in your company.
Maybe it would be best to start with consulting a lawyer, maybe one recommended by Childline or someone similarly interested in such issues. Then you could start a court case to ask for the father to have proper access, with the kids visiting him at his home, as frequently as can be afforded, and maybe to clarify issues of custody ( the court could be asked to decide whether the mother / step-father are appropriate for custody, and the COurt could be asked to send them for assessment to help decide this . If the son wants to be with his father, the court should take notice of that.
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