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Question
Posted by: cat | 2008/06/11

i made him mine

i met this guy he had 2 kids with different mothers and those kids born some year different month.year 2001.and here comes me 2004.and i knew he still having an affair with both of them.i said to my self if i want him to be mine is going to be mine,because i love him and i wish oneday can be my husband.2007 i felt pregnant and is where he started to be serious about me and he married me,mind do i dont know the guy very well.and now we marriedi dont understand him.he is diffirent,always when he goes somewhere im left behind,he is secritive.too quite if he want to.we dont share thinks like husband& wife,he always pushing away, but he says he loves me. what should i do?move out or try to fix things.I LOVE HIM .

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Why on earth decide that a man who is cheating two women already, "will be yours" --- why would you want him ? And what makes you imagine that he will suddenly behave genuinely lovingly to you, when he doesn't do so to anyone else ? "Loving" him is never enough. For Pete's sake, once you got him to marry you, he is continuing to behave the way he always did --- what made you fantasize that he would change for you ?
And I feel nauseous every time I see the comment "Who are you to judge people?" --- some forms of behaviour are antisocial and deserve to be criticised by the community as they selfishly damage others ( like the unfortunate children of this tomcat ).

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Our users say:
Posted by: FIGMENT | 2008/06/12

ANON... CLEARLY YOU HAVE A MAJOR PROBLEM ,IT SEEMS AS THOUGH YOU FIND STRENGHT BY UNDERMINING THE NEXT....SHMAE ON YOU!!!!!

Reply to FIGMENT
Posted by: Ya ya | 2008/06/12

You don't have to be rude to be realistic!!!!

Reply to Ya ya
Posted by: anon | 2008/06/12

am not harsh am just realistic as a woman i cant believe one can be so naive take reponsibilty ,some women are genuinely played and i feel sorry but this is crap u deserve it catch a bloody wakeup

Reply to anon
Posted by: EXPERIENCED | 2008/06/11

I have been in a similar situation ,i knew the guy was married but yet i went ahead and got involved ,he divorced he's wife and we got married .....he did so much harm but i was in complete denial and refused to acknowledge the truth ,up until i realised i was most important and i did my own thing and moved on .....well i have him running after me now ....but the day you realise that you are most important and start respecting yourself he's attitude towards you will change and he'll start respecting you ...But the change STARTS WITH YOU.....WE ARE ALLOWED TO MAKE MISTAKES ONLY IF WE CAN LEARN FROM IT.

Reply to EXPERIENCED
Posted by: sadi | 2008/06/11

SOME WOMEN JUST NEVER LEARN!!!

Reply to sadi
Posted by: really | 2008/06/11

Anon you are very harsh. Are you always like that? Maybe you are the one that has to submit your problem because you definitely have one.

Reply to really
Posted by: Hell no | 2008/06/11

You know I blame men because they are the ones that lie to us and then you tell yourself in the back of your mind that maybe he will change but they never change. Forget about him raise your child on your own and move on...

Reply to Hell no
Posted by: reggie | 2008/06/11

Who are you to judge people?

Reply to reggie
Posted by: charity | 2008/06/11

What about HIV?go for check up

Reply to charity
Posted by: I | 2008/06/11

Ladies, it's called HIV and it exists and affects millions in this country. Why do we set ourselves up like this and endanger our lives, and risk our children becoming orphans?

Reply to I
Posted by: Nokz | 2008/06/11

Irrespective of whether its a prank or not I still think the problem is the same, its there and it exist. This is not about being a woman and hurting yourself. Its about men who lie and cannot tell the truth, by the time you find out their true selves you are too much inlove with them......Sister get over it an move on, HE WILL NEVER CHANGE, I love my man too...but I know he will never change whether or not I dirvoce him.

Reply to Nokz
Posted by: anon | 2008/06/11

another stupid idiot what the hell ,when u got together he was having it with these women what did u do said u will win him over ,its bitten u in the ass deal with it his not going to stop his fixing u cos ur are so dumb,catch a bloody wakeup in this day and age one cant be so naive ,ur pathetic

Reply to anon
Posted by: Hayi No! | 2008/06/11

Eish im with u GVOR on this one, i will never understand us women sometimes, why did u try so hard to make that man urs after knowing his history with his baby mama ect, For crying out loud the guy was still seeing them when u met him,im sure he is still seeing one of them even now!!! Gosh!!!
Well its up to u whether u stay or go...

Reply to Hayi No!
Posted by: Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR) | 2008/06/11

I hope that thisis just a prankster or the same person as Beyonce as Kb is saying. Because WHYYYYY, why do women do this to themselves hey? You knew the guy had 2 other children, 2 different women, same year. 2 different months. What makes any self respecting woman be attractedto a man like that, or worse have aspirations to become his wife. Im ashamed at times to call myself part of the female species, because we can really be daft sometimes, honestly guys. I dont knw what to say to you Cat. You got yourself into a mess, brought a child into it, all I can say is I feel sorry for that child.

Reply to Gentle Voice Of Reason (GVOR)
Posted by: i | 2008/06/11

U're right about the english, if nothing else.

Reply to i
Posted by: Kb | 2008/06/11

Guys im sure cat, beyonce and charity are the same people as their stories are all very much the same, and their english is very much the same too, bad. What do you guys think? I hope not as they are wasting everyones time.

Reply to Kb

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