Our expert says:
If you'll actually check the archives of the forum thoroughl;y, you'll find there were numerous people who had similar feelings, but who did indeed find other ways, happier, healthier and more satisfying.
I fully agree with Don't Do IT. I can't imagien what condition you think you are suffering from, as there is NO condition known to science or medicine which would impose on you the sort of inevitable fate you seem to be assuming.
There is absolutely nothing whatever cowardly about making the sensible decision NOT to commit suicide --- there is FAR more bravery in deciding to get competent help, persevere, and work to solve your problems. Suicide merely brings appalling grief to anyone who cares about you.
There is NO condition in which it is imposible to have relationships --- some may make it a bit more difficult, but that's different. And if you had an unfortunate experience with a psychologist, well, don't just give up and let him get away with makign a mess out of the way he treated you --- persist, find a better shrink, get better, and then visit the psychologist who messed up, to show him how well you could have done much earlier, if he'd have done his job properly. If he rejected you, or treated you problems as a joke, then he was a truly lousy psychologist. That's no reason for you to punish yourself.
Don't act out violently towards the shrink either --- that will only lower yourself below his level, and will give people who have been unreasonably scornful of you, good reason to scorn you. That you've found FOUR lousy shrinks is an awful thought --- but it doesn't mean that the entire species is at fault or as useless for you as the ones you saw.
So, you apparently met a lousy or careless shrink --- that's bad and hurtful. But nop reason for you to ruin your life, and to prevent him from learning how to treat people better.
I understand how very angry and disheartened you are, but you are not being as logical as you seem to think. You make a scornful comment about CBT, yet when done properly, it does exactly what you describe as what you wanted --- and never involves you sitting round listening to the shrink warbling on. And again, it sounds as if they did indeed function poorly, as they should not be providing you with their ideals, and beliefs, but helping you to clarify and make good use of your own.
None of us can convince you to do anything you don't want to do. But I do hope that you will cool down a bit and decide to spite these 4 lousy shrinks, by persisting in getting your own life together, according to your own ideals, with better help than they were apparently able to provide, and proving tem wrong. If they didn't think much of you, then suicide, let alone with a preceeding act of violence, will only seem to prove them right --- and you won't be around to represent your own point of view.
Stay around, and do contribute more of your thoughtful eloquence to our discussion of various reasons. Yes indeed, some of the problems presented here are indeed petty --- but they're the biggest problem those people have yet had to face. Stay round to remind them of the things that really matter, and to get their own alarm into perspective. I look forward to hearing more from you next week, and beyond.
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