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Posted by: Charlie | 2005/11/30

I have decided

I am sure all of you will be glad to know that i have told the man that i want a divorce. The fist thing he did was tell his parents who called an emergency meeting and basically told us if we get a divorce they will make our live a living hell and obviously made me feel guilty for messing up my childs life. They have lots of money and think that money make the world go round and that is exactly what they said. They provide for my daughter in a big way, well they pay for her school fees which is a bit, but as i said to them i will eat bred and butter to make sure she gets what she deserves as all times.

I am being the selfish one here, but i am doing it to get my daughter out of this situation and to keep myself sane. We went home last night and tried to talk but it goes back to the same thing. He does not want me to have friends and he rants and raves and swears whenever he speaks and today i have just decided that i am not going to give this another chance, despite what they say i will manage.

What do you guys think.

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Our expert says:
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Tell his parents that if they even try to cary out their threat to make your life a living hell, you'll have a court order slapped on them which will forbid them to harrass you in any way whatsoever. Money will not prevent that from happening, nor their selfishness. The divorce will not harm your daughter, but their selfish efforts to interfere, might do so. You're not being selfish at all.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Enough | 2005/11/30

You go girl on the long run you will see that you have made the right decision.....Good luck

Reply to Enough
Posted by: Delene | 2005/11/30

Charlie, So happy about your decision & may I sa, very proud of you. I know its not an easy decision at all.
Of course they will make you feel guilty...and of course they will try to control you with money.(can see where your husband gets his controllive behaviour from), but do not get distracted from your goal. Your goal is to make sure you & your daughter have a good 7 decent life. Let them threaten, let them trow tantrums.....YOU COME FIRST.

And since they wanna let you know how much money they got, good, they are still obligated then to keep paying for the child. make sure you have a good attourney to help you with these matters. You do not need to settle for less at all.
The law is on your side.

I hope you make a plan to move out as soon as possible. For as long as you live with him, he still has power over you. Break that power. And dont give in at all. You are stronger than him, cuz you dont need to controll no one.

Good on you!!
All the best
D

Reply to Delene
Posted by: take the leap! | 2005/11/30

Just giving my 10c worth....don’t be bullied into staying my friend. What would be in it for your daughter in the long run is my concern? Observing a father like that? She might grow up thinking all men are like that and that his behaviour is okay, or even worse - she might grow up being bitter for what her parents put her through. Oh I can go on….I think best just to get out ASAP, for yourself and for your daughter.

(ps - is ur mother in law like the queen mother?)

Reply to take the leap!
Posted by: Valkyrie | 2005/11/30

Frusty: I agree with you.......she will not be alone....we will stick with her.

Reply to Valkyrie
Posted by: Frusty | 2005/11/30

Stick to your guns, girl. It will be worth it. You will get support here on the forum, I can promise you that.

Reply to Frusty
Posted by: me 2 | 2005/11/30

I have decided
I'm gonna live like a believer
Turn my back on the deceiver....

I have decided
Being good is just a fable
I know I cant coz' I'm not able
I'm gonna leave it to the Lord

Reply to me 2
Posted by: Nicolai | 2005/11/30

Charlie, good for you, stick to your guns. When you are in such an obvious miserable relationship, where you can never say a thing, with a man who can't control his temper - what good can money do? There are so many miserable women wondering the malls, in search of happiness that they cant find at home.

And coming from a divorced home myself, the best thing my mother did was leave my father. Next time tell those meddeling parents in law that they should have perhaps invested more money into their son seeing a shrink.

Reply to Nicolai
Posted by: Valkyrie | 2005/11/30

Charlie: I can get the darn kreeps when these rich think they can rule the world. I am no bible pusher but there are some go answers in when one really needs to give someone a punch in the eye. It comes down to that the rich are like sheep being fattened for the slaughter, you must see their faces when you through that at them......
Don't let them make you any more miserble.

Reply to Valkyrie

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