Posted by: mixed up | 2006/07/16

I don't know myself any more

hi there, I know I am mentally ok I just think I am emotionally a wreck, on the surface I'm in control and ok to people and they all say how strong I am, I help peolpe and give them advise when they are hurting, but I cnnot seem to help myself and inside I feel like I'm dead, I get angry so quickly i forget things even from a few days ago (not every thing, but someone will ask me what did you do then and sometimes I really have to think what did I do) and sometimes if I walk in a room I have to try and remember what I came there for and then it comes back to me. The doctors said my son had down syndrome after he was born 2 years ago and it was such a shock, I love my child, but sometimes i feel so guilty over what my body had done, and as selfish as this sounds, why me, why my child. I do have good days, but days like today, my heart gets so sore it feels it could break. I have also picked up so much weight.
Do you think I am just depressed or do you think my hormones are out of sink and need fixing.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Its usual that even folks who are well able to advise and help others, may themselves have problems they find hard to deal with --- it may not be easy to take our own advice ! And what you describe as your reaction to having a child with Down's Syndrome is also normal ---you may feel guilty ( though there was absolutely nothing you did which caused this to happen, and nothing you could have done to prevent it from happening ). And we all ask "why me?" after such a sad event. That's human. not selfish. Depression could well be a significant part of the problem, so do see a good local shrink for assessment and treatment advice, probably including medication and counselling. I doubt that the hormones themselves are the problem

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