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Question
Posted by: Cheating Witch | 2005/12/09

I cheated, help

I am the awful cheating spouse!!! In the last two years I cheated on my husband with 4 men. 3 were married and we only had sex - no emotions involved, no strings attached!! WRONG WRONG WRONG I know, still don't know whyi did it. Now number 4 is a single guy, we never had sex, just lots of talking and an occasional kiss and hug. Everyday he sms's me to see how i'm doing, telling me he'll support whatever decision I make re divorce. (Was considering divorce way before got involved with any of them- actually) as long as I can promise him I'll be happy. Feel I'm falling hard for this guy, but is he for real? Anyway, don't want to leave hubby for another man, but only because nothing left to salvage of marriage- he's emotionally unavailable and verbally cruel. On the other hand, if he knew about other guys- he would leave straight away, so what am I still doing here? SHould I take a chance on nr 4? Maybe I don't deserve a good man- seeing as I'm such a BAD BAD BAD person. YEs, I deserve all the ugly names u guys are going to call me, but if anybody out there with some advice, that would also be appreciated.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Come on now, you surely have some idea why you did it ? It wasn't random. It wasn't because there was nothing interesting on TV. And as for any of them, you of course can't promise them that you'll be happy.
Is there any chance of working within mariage counselling, with your husband, to salvage the marriage ? If not, rather work towards a peaceful divorce than further cheating.
You're not a bad person, but a person who has done bad things. You can earn a good man --- we can't guess whether this No. 4 is or is not. But settle your marriage one way or the other, then take your time.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: SANDY | 2005/12/12

YES IT IS WRONG TO CHEAT, AND IT IS NOT NICE TO BE ON THE RECEIVING SIDE.BUT MAYBE YOU WHERE JUST REACHING OUT TO FIND WHAT WAS MISSING IN YOUR LIFE.

ONE THING I CAN SAY TO YOU IS END ONE THING BEFORE YOU START SOMETHING ELSE.

EVERYONE DESERVES TO BE HAPPY EVEN YOU.DESIDE WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY AND GO FOR IT, BUT BE COMMITED TO JUST ONE.IT MUST BE TIRING TO LIFE LIKE THAT.

GOOD LUCK

Reply to SANDY
Posted by: Lucifer | 2005/12/10

Hi

Hey, I have cheated with ONE guy and the world calls me crazy names etc. I know i deserve this 'cos I have a wonderful husband.

But, I am only human, and YES I did make a mistake. It's just that when this other guy came into my life, he made me feel so alive again.....and YOU KNOW WHAT.........this actually made my relationship with the hubby so much more exciting. It's crazy and sounds really twisted but I felt so alive.

It's just that this affair goes against everything I ever believed in and now I have to live with it. You, on the other hand, need to assess your own life without having another man in it. If No4 was not around, would you still consider divorce? If hubby is not emotionally fair to you, why are you still with him? Take a break away from them both and think clearly about what direction you would like your life to follow.

I guess I need to take some of my own advice. I'm just selfish, wanting to have my cake and eat it too....

Goodluck!!!!!!

Reply to Lucifer
Posted by: Deubel | 2005/12/10

Sorry, cannot really give advice to people having no respect for their marriage vows and their spouses.

Reply to Deubel
Posted by: ?? | 2005/12/10

no problem, every thing is fair in SEX

Reply to ??
Posted by: ZeeZee | 2005/12/09

You are not a bad person only human...like Tango said get some counceling.....Good luck

Reply to ZeeZee
Posted by: Tango | 2005/12/09

I am not going to call you bad names. Perhaps you have cheated because your emotional needs are not been met. That is not letting you off the hook! But I can understand why. All I can say is, its never a good idea to leave a marriage for someone else. Get some counselling. You need to work through all these feelings with a prefessional before you make any decisions. Good luck.

Reply to Tango

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