advertisement
Question
Posted by: JC | 2006/07/18

hygeine

I have a boyfriend who is 19 and im 22 his really mature for his age although i have some issues with his hygeine and not sure how to confront him without him taking it the wrong way as he does with most things i say and then end up fighting, I only stay at his house on weekends even though he still lives with his wicked step mother and his dad. His step mother is very dirty she doesn clean up at all his little brothers wee on the toilet seat and it just stays like that, his bedding on his bed hasn been washed in ages you can see it and i know he showers once a day but i don't think its enough, as he is a very active person. It has gotten to a stage where i carry a bottle of dettol with me and clean the seat before i sit on the toilet and everything i touch gets dettoled first. Every week i come home and something else goes wrong with me and makes me feel disgusting as i am a very clean person, last week was lice Eg. what do i do please help i really love him.

Not what you were looking for? Try searching again, or ask your own question
Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If she's really a WICKED stepmother, does he like her ? If not, the very idea that he might be getting like her in any way might be enough for him to revise his habits ? Is there any substitute for calmly and pleasantly talking with him about what is bothering you ? You could imply that you assume he also finds her standards of cleanliness disturbing, and sympathize with him.
But if he chooses to live in such squalor ( and he could keep his own room clean, at least ) and even lice, why would you want to say with such a guy ? And none of that would be a sign of maturity on his part.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

4
Our users say:
Posted by: Tango | 2006/07/18

I am also Tango by the way. Post here as Tango and Panther(Ms) on Mens Forum - in case I confuse you!

Reply to Tango
Posted by: Panther(Ms) | 2006/07/18

You must just think about what you are putting up with here. At 19 he should know by now whats cleanliness and whats not. If he is prepared to live like that then maybe thats his style anyway. Even if the rest of the place is filthy he should keep his room, his person and his linen very clean. Do not do his linen!! He will always expect you to. Start with the nd in mind.

Reply to Panther(Ms)
Posted by: JC | 2006/07/18

He can't stand his step mother he keeps his room relatively neat although washing his bedding his step mother wont do it and i can't expect him to go without bedding so i can take it home and do it. Im in two minds wether i should just leave him or not cos i feel digusting at his home and i know talking to him will hurt his feelings and if i leave him all my problems will be solved.

Reply to JC
Posted by: Tango | 2006/07/18

You say he is very mature for his age - yet you say he takes things most of the time the wrong way. That is not a sign of a mature person.

Just tell him straight out that his bed is disgusting. He should be doing his linen himself anyway. Tell him to do it. If he fights over personal hygiene and you have already walked away with lice - then I have to question you as to why are you putting up with this. Love is not enogh!

Reply to Tango

Have your say

Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
Thanks for commenting! Your comment will appear on the site shortly.
advertisement