Our expert says:
What happened in the past was, obviously, awful. But it sounds as though he has really reformed, apologised and don a lot to make amends. So the remaining problem seems to lie more in the way you have been unable, so far, to work through these issues and get beyong it.
We can't re-write the facts of history - maybe you could have chosen various other men, but you didn't, and you can't go back and make a different choice. But what we can re-script is the conclusions we choose to draw from past experiences, and how we choose to allow these to continue to influence us. This is where a counsellor / therapist, especially one of the CBT, Cognitive-Behaviour Therapy variety, can help you work through the aftermath of this awful experience, and move on to a happer and freer life.
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