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Question
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/26

husband and work no communicating well

I'm a brothel owner. My husband knows what I do. He is constantly getting involved with the girls here, but then denies having anything to do with them. How I'm I supposed to keep my dignity.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Dear Phone,
Supposing that yours is indeed a serious question, don't snipe at volcano --- probably a majority of the population would consider that there is no dignity in the profession of owning a brothel --- and surely you knew that long before you opened one. And this is hardly a "skeleton in your closet", unless you run a highly unusual form of brothel. Yo have a right to choose your own line of work, but not, actually, to insist that whatever it is, other people must respect it. hey're under no obligation to do so.
And there is something contradictory in your response, which may be why it is troubling you. If your consider brothel-keeping merely "providing a service", when why shouldn't your husband make use of that service ? Why should it be fine for other women's husbands to use the service, and not yours ? If he is "having an affair", then isn't that what these other women's husbands are doing, too, and isn't that equally objectionable ? Why is it OK ( in your view ) for those other men, and not for your husband ? Maybe the experience can convey to you how the wives of your other customers are likely to feel about it, something you may want to take into consideration.
Some would feel that even if it were legal to own and/or operate a brothel, one of the costs of choosing such a line of business, is that (a) dignity doesn't automatically go with the territory ( and inner dignity, i/e/ how you feel about yourself, is up to you, and not to other people ) ; and (b) if you actually own and run it --- why can't you keep your husband out of it ?
If you ran a dress shop, and your hubby kept popping in and trying on the dresses, I'm sure you'd have no trouble in forbidding him to do so ? SO why has this been difficult for you ?

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Our users say:
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/27

Dear CyberShrink,
I don't think you understand the concept. Paying for sex is one thing - which I really DON'T mind my husband doing - BUT I DO have a problem with the fact that there are more to this than just sex. When a person starts having feelings for another, it starts going beyond doing business How are you not able to understand that? i.e Also read my message to LA above.

Reply to Phone
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/27

LA,

Ha,Ha, Very funny. You sound like one of the clients! You don't seem to fully understand the difference between business and pleasure Between providing a service and having an affair.

Reply to Phone
Posted by: LA | 2004/02/27

l think you do not fully appreciate what your hubby is doing. He is helping you provide a good service by doing quality control checks for you. He is showing genuine concern for the success of your enterprise. You women never really appreciate what we men do for you. How could you interprete his actions so badly.

Reply to LA
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/27

Volcano,
It's not your place to judge people, BUT I do respect your point of veiw, because you ARE allowed to have one. Thank you for your reply.

Reply to Phone
Posted by: volcano | 2004/02/26

I am not looking down on anybody. Personally I feel that the prostitutes whom you are probably exploiting have more dignity than the one pimping them. You do realise that that is illegal. Now I ask again; what dignity has some-one who illegaly pimps prostitutes think they have?? Some prostitutes may have no other means of putting bread in the mouths of their children. What excuse do you have?

Reply to volcano
Posted by: Ha | 2004/02/26

What immorality. You do not deserve a faithful husband. Repent and do good maybe you'll get a faithful husband but for now..........forget it. He probably thinks of u as a slut.

Reply to Ha
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/26

Eve, thank you for your answer. It's not like he hangs around (he has his own bussiness). But you are 100% right, I need to take a firmer stand on this matter.

Reply to Phone
Posted by: Joke | 2004/02/26

Is this a joke?

Reply to Joke
Posted by: eve | 2004/02/26

i think you should maybe let your husband know that he is not welcome near or around your work. the girls are probably laughing behind your back cos your hubby cant keep his snake in his pants and in that respect the girls probably dont think of you as there boss.... it s your business not his so what is he doing hanging around.

Reply to eve
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/26

Not pissy with anyone, but as you said OPEN forum......
Don't care if people look down on me - we all have our sceletons in the closet, some are just to scared to deal with them. Thank you for your interest.

Reply to Phone
Posted by: J | 2004/02/26

Interesting reply to Volcano's response. You're going to get flack here Phone - wether you like it or not - this is an OPEN forum and people dont have to "keep out of it", and your topic is rather controversal. If you want to get pissy with people looking down on what you do you should never have posted here.

Reply to J
Posted by: Phone | 2004/02/26

Volcano, you have no idea what you're talking about, so keep out of it!

Reply to Phone
Posted by: break | 2004/02/26

volcano, give her a break.she is doing more than our goverment is doing - she is creating jobs! ;-D

Reply to break
Posted by: volcano | 2004/02/26

What dignity? You are a brothel owner.

Reply to volcano

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