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Question
Posted by: Anony | 2004/11/11

Hurts, disappointments, insecurities, sadness

My boyfriend and I met a year and some months ago, everything happened so fast and next thing I was pregnant. I told him and he left me for another girl. I was alone and pregnant. I had to tell my parents Im pregnant and not with the father. We made up after that but I stilll did not feel he wants to be with me. It has always been me chasing after him to make the so called relationship work. Two weeks before I gave birth he left me again and he was with someone else again. I went home to my family and that was the worst time of my life. I got to the point where I felt I was dead. One night he called and said he wants to make up so I agreed but I wasn't happy. He saw his child when she was one month and I spoke to him. He felt he wasn't wrong and said he made up with me because its what I wanted. He said he was going to think what he really wants. He phoned me and said that he wants us to get back together. We spoke and I said that he can't get back with me just for the baby. he said that's not why. He wants us to be together. Since, we've been trying to build on this relationship but I still feel insecure and worry that he will do the same to me. Ive expressed exactly how I feel and he knows how much he has hurt me. He didn't want to end a friendship with a girl that was causing some of our problems but he did eventually. He has hurt me so much that sometimes little things trigger those bad moments. How do I ever get past and move on. I love him and he says he loves me, I want things to work out for us but im afraid if I continue to feel this way, Im going to lose him again. This makes me really sad and I just want to be happy, apart from all the other bad things in my life.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

If the guy has to be chased after, he's not worth chasing. Pursuing with a lawyer, maybe, to make him pay maintenance for his baby, but he's highly unlikely to be a worthwhile partner. Maybe, if you;re tempted by his idea of getting back together, it'd be worth first jointly seeing a relationship counsellor, to check on the wisdom of such a move.

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Hopefull | 2004/11/11

I understand that you are hurting but you need to remember
happynes is a emotion, not something someone els can give away , it's all in your hands if he hurts you and have other women around that happynes will never come to you.
My Ex girlfriend did the same to me and i have seen that you need to make your live wat you want and not depend on others
to make you happy.You have a Child and they cant be drawn into pain and hurt even by the perants trying to make something
inposable to work.

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