Our expert says:
If nothing has improved for 7 years, it's not likely to improve spontaneously. If you could persuade her to join you in mariage counselling, perhaps with help ( eg through FAMSA ) things could improve, but only if she, as well as you, would sincerely work with the counsellor to improve the situation. Maybe stop paying her money for the household, and suggest instead that you will draw up together a schedule of the full household and family costs, and divide in in proportion to what each of you earn. It's nonsense for you to pay most of the expenses, while she spends her money only on herself and her own family.
I wonder what the elders thought if her bad behaviour
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