Posted by: christina | 2008/10/22


2yrs ago I was rejected by a man because i have a child and he went and married someone else. this really hurt me a lot but I tried to put it behind me.

we are both born again christians and he said he cannot go out with somebody who has a child.

now things have been ok with me, but everytime when i hear that one of the church members is getting married, it really hurts me. for example my friend told me that her sister is getting married next year and i just froze, felt empty inside and i wanted to cry... i felt the same pain that i felt 2 years ago.

why is this happening to me?

i wont say that im jealous but instead i think her sister deserves the best since she was single for a long time.

but why do i feel like this? it feels like i can just run away or die...

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

His attitude doesn't sound very Christian to me. Anyhow. What you're feeling is probably a variety of jealousy, but not in the sense of begrudging the other person their marriage or happiness, more that such situations remind you that you don't have that --- YET. ANd you seem to be feeling unnecessarily hopeless, as though you're giving up on your own chances of a stable and enjoyable relationship. See a counsellor if necessary, to shake off these negative attitudes and to be better able to move forward

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: christina | 2008/10/22

I think it reminds me that i was once close to marriage and blew it all up, not realising that im doing that.

later i apologised to him over and over again and he said he will not take me back. in his culture they do not have kids outside wedlock and does not see himself with me now that i have a baby.

to cut a long story short, we were friends with him for 6months when i joined their church. and he told me that he loves me and one day he would like to know me better and possible marry me.

by that time i had a boyfriend and i told him. he said i can stay with him if i want to. i was planning to leave my boyfriend because our relationship was not going anywhere.

eventually i told my boyfriend that im leaving him because i fell in love with someone else. he did not want to accept this and on that day we went to a party and ended in bed. the next day i took the morning after pill but it did not help.

after baby was born, i confronted the man by sms to apologise and he said its all my fault, i planned this and so our friendship is over. and we' ll never be lovers cos

why is it so difficut for some man to forgive, even if u made a mistake and apologise for it?

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