Posted by: Gaby | 2012/06/03

Hubby at the Gynae?

Picked up on massive debate in earlier posts regarding men going to gynae rooms with their women. I was shocked to read some of the replies infering that " things happen in there" .
All REPUTABLE gynae''s do not, repeat, do not do an internal or very personal examination without a nurse in the room with him.
So you have the patient, the doctor, the nurse and the partner all crowded around? Not practical at all!! Imho the only time both partners should be together is pregnancy (and then not every time) or if some dread disease is suspected.

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Posted by: sexologist | 2012/06/05

This post is an expression of an opinion

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Posted by: Anon4This Too | 2012/06/04

Anon4This: Gaby and Wife are probably glad you are not married to them either! Woman are not woesses (sp?) we can handle these things ourselves.

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Posted by: Anon4This | 2012/06/04

Glad I am not married to Gaby or Wife

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Posted by: Gaby | 2012/06/04

Your choice - I did say I''m " old school"  - been there done that! So what I mean is when in gynae''s room women tend to feel uptight so its good to lie there and concentrate on relaxing. I am long married to a wonderful, supportive man, have 3 children all in their 20''s and dont have any of the problems you mention.
Just trying to say that men should not worry about what happens in the gynae''s rooms.

Reply to Gaby
Posted by: your choice | 2012/06/04

well Gaby, if your hubbie makes you to not relax, you should check that issue, and if you are preggie on your own, then dont expect support, its your body, your baby, so if you need the respect to be on your own, dont moan if hubbie is not always there to support, if a papsmear shows bad results, also deal with that on your own

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Posted by: Gaby | 2012/06/04

Informative replies guys. Coming from ''the old school'', I suppose you could call it, personally feel that monthly preggie appointments (if all is well) are so mundane and some hubbies do have 9-5 jobs and cannot be there. Pap smears I prefer to be on my own as I''m much more relaxed which is so important for gynae to do the necessary.
One thing hubbies often say today is " We are pregnant" ! My tempted response, for what its worth is:- Congratulations, well done but sorry guys YOU are not pregnant - your wife is! Am I being insensitive here?

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Posted by: wife | 2012/06/04

I am with Gaby, my husband can stay at home or work, I am big enough to handle the gynae app by myself, no place for a man, other than the doc, this is between the patient and a doctor, even in marriage, some things are private, and the gynae is one of those things, in pregnancy for external ultrasound only, and hubbie, a foot doctor and a gynae are quite different, my hubbie is welcome at any doctor, but never the gynae

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Posted by: Alison | 2012/06/04

Hi Gaby
I like you prefer to go alone, but during pregnancy, my hubbie came every time, you say even then, not every time, I suppose he must wait outside if an internal examination is on the cards, this only makes him feel more seperated from the whole thing. I let my hubbie come 1 time for a regular check up and pap smear, not for my conscience, but his.He never came again, not my choice, but his. Sometimes us woman must give a little, even if it doesnt make practical sense. Believe me, I would rather have as few peoople in the room as possible, but I have learned, that men are just different that way, and they need to feel needed in every situation, especially if its an uncomfortable situation for us.

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Posted by: hubby | 2012/06/04

Gaby, the guys on that post did not, and I repeat did not think anything un professional was happenning, it was not about that at all, it was guys feelings, they did not think anything wrong, they would just like to be present when another man, be he a doctor has to view and touch their wives breasts and vaginas, it is a male insecurity thing, or what I dont know, and I suppose the room may get crowded, but no more crowded than with a pregnancy. If its no big deal, then why do woman have an issue with taking their husbands with, why would a woman let their husbands into say a foot doctor, but a gynae is not acceptable, is it only men that see this as a different doctor, maby if woman were more open with their husbands regarding gynaecologists, men would feel more comfortable. What I read, was their was no mistrust from the husbands regarding their wives or the doc, just a protective curiosity. I was the same, but when my wife started inviting me into the exam room, I quickly saw how quick the exam was, and was 100% comfortable, the silly issue I had, and I repeat silly, was soon sorted out, once viewing the procedure. It may be a silly issue, but for a man that even knows that, it can still bug him, so ladies just compromise for a lousy 20minutes a year.

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