Posted by: lucky luke | 2008/07/31

how to handle new relationship

I am a 27 year old male.I just recently have to courage to ask a girl i have a 1st serious one.the thing is i always said if i get a girlfriend she would never complain about NOT GIVEN her any attention cause i am a very loving person.I always want kisses hugs and things like my girlfriend is not really in to it.or she does not tell me.or maybe i am just thinking to much. i just cannot relax.if i dont hear from her i think something is wrong.which i know its not.i dont call her that often cause i dont want to be a nusens.she is studying.she is really a great girl.i constantly give her compliments when i text her. but last time she told me she does not see what i i giving her to much or what..i dont know.i know its my 1st relationship and all but i really like to make it work.and dont want to seem that i dont know what i am doing. so any tips for me.. and then.I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH HER..where to take her i mean.we went dancing.we have seen EVERY movie available.i have NOT been to her house yet.weird actually.How do one suggest that.i dont know.please help!!i am clueless

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Sounds like your distress arises both from being unfamiliar with suh relationships, so far, and to low self-esteem and self-confidence. Her studies are important, and maybe she doesn't really ned to frequent reassurtance you seem to be seeking. You may, overall, be trying too hard.
Excellent response from Maria, as usual ! Focus, as Lolo suggests, on talking with her, and finding out what she wants, rather than giving her generic attention you just assume she will appreciate

The information provided does not constitute a diagnosis of your condition. You should consult a medical practitioner or other appropriate health care professional for a physical exmanication, diagnosis and formal advice. Health24 and the expert accept no responsibility or liability for any damage or personal harm you may suffer resulting from making use of this content.

Our users say:
Posted by: Lolo | 2008/08/01

Maria is right, girls have different need and the only way to please them is to know what they like and what they don' t, to achieve that communication is the only way, find out from her what is it that she loves doing, places she wanna go and don' t focus on her alone let her know what you also love doing, then the two of you might compromise sometimes.

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Posted by: Zola | 2008/08/01

This post sounds farmiliar to me....

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Posted by: Maria | 2008/07/31

Hey Lucky Luke

All girls don' t want the same things. Impress your girlfriend and read a book called " The Five Love Languages"  by Gary Chapman. Discuss it with her, and you will find out what her needs are.

What you do together will depend on your interests and budget! Clubbing, hiking, a walk on the beach, a trip in a hot air balloon, an art gallery, bookshops, bungee jumping, picnic...

You don' t have to compliment her in every sms. A simple " Thinking of you"  or " Hope you are studying well"  will be enough if she finds the compliments a bit much.

Where do you usually meet if you haven' t been to her house yet? Maybe just ask her if you can come over for coffee?

In the end, communication can make or break a relationship. A girl can' t expect a guy to read her mind... if you want to know what she likes to do, ask her!

Good luck!

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