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Question
Posted by: Angel | 2007/05/16

How do you deal with someone

........who always puts you down? A colleague of mine always say all these negative things about me and I dont know what to say.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Ignoring them is an excellent way to annoy them and take all the fun out of it. But I'd agree with Dude that I'd first confront her calmly ( again, that's more annoying ) and tell her that her negative comments have been annoying and about matters that are none of her business, and in future you plan to pay no attention at all to them, as they are becoming repetitious and boring.

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Our users say:
Posted by: Dude | 2007/05/17



wud disagree with most of the advice posted here, the best thing to do is to confront her about it and tell her that it bothers you and ask her ot stop bashing your character, firmly... but in the nice way that have...

thats all folk fookers
Dude

Reply to Dude
Posted by: Echelle | 2007/05/16

Yip, just tell her straight in her face to back off!

Reply to Echelle
Posted by: Fora | 2007/05/16

Discipline her - Let me tell you, I had the same situation when I started to work with the lady "1st lady" that the name I gave her after she thinks she is all that, by then she was pregnant, she was just trouble, asking me why i did my hair like this not the other way, my clothes and all those funny things. Tell her not to interfere with your personal life in case she does. Do not feed her with your personal problems, she will use them against you. And whoever you be-friends its just none of her business (Tel her). Do not fear her or make her feel special just be nice but draw that line. But your confidence must remain. Good luck !!!

Reply to Fora
Posted by: FM | 2007/05/16

(sorry) If she thinks that is not affecting you, she'll soon give up.

Reply to FM
Posted by: FM | 2007/05/16

Look her in the eye, expressionless, and when she's finished saying whatever she has to say, turn round or get up and walk away, without saying a word.

Reply to FM
Posted by: Echelle | 2007/05/16

then tell her: ... if you aren't able to make friends and to make people like you then don't take it out on me

Reply to Echelle
Posted by: Angel | 2007/05/16

No, I dont want to make feel small. I think its jealous, Im married with 3kids still look very good for my age, people always think Im in my early 20 and I've just hit the 30's. Guys at work like me, I have a good heart, I like interacting with people and adives where I can. This interaction with guys she always use it against me to her advantage. She will always remind me that Im married and Im the mother of 3 I must stay away from other men and its pure friendship and colleagues nothing else. Im trying to avoid her esp the remarks but she keeps on pushing me.

Reply to Angel
Posted by: me2 | 2007/05/16

If she's ugly make a comment like at least I can lose weight, you will always be ugly ? Find something that you know riles her and hammer on that. Or start every day to say things like you look so pale are you ok ? Or your hair really looks lifeless can I recommend a shampoo ?

Reply to me2
Posted by: Echelle | 2007/05/16

Tell her: ...if I were you I wouldn't saying anything, cause if you go look in the mirror and do some IQ tests then you'll be amazed how stupid you really are... etc etc

Reply to Echelle

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