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Question
Posted by: Bony | 2004/11/04

How do I deal with her

My boyfriend's ex is really a pain on my back side. Never have I felt so insecure in a relationship like I do at this moment , thanks to her .She was his first steady girlfriend and he was her first real boyfriend. They broke up years back but from what I heard whenever they meet , they'll have sex irrespective of whether they are involved in other relationships or not. My boyfriend even told me that sex was great between the two of them , she's very seductive and he cant resist control himself around her. This has left me in a very sticky situation.Though she's married , I know that she used to have sex with my boyfriend before he met me. He assures me that sex is great between the 2 of us and he wont indulge in any sexual ctivities with her, he's content with me.But deep down inside me I feel very, very insecure. I stopped him from having any contact with her , but this one time she called and invited him for dinner at her place. He only told me about it when I asked him who called. She's over confident of herself I think she has this belief that she can get him to sleep with her anytime she wants . Although he says its not true , I dont believe him either . Looks like he's under her spell ,he looks like he's unsure of himself in terms of whether he can resist her or not . It makes me feel not good enough , how do I deal with this. I know he does not contact her ( so he told me) but she still calls him even though he tells her not to. What's the issue with people getting stuck with their first real relationships? why cant people move on . I dont have any issue with any of other exes he had after they broke up . But this woman , wish i could strangle her big time , she's making me very insecure.

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Check out our archive of this forum, as we've discussed various problems with nasty Ex's many, many times. But if he's still having sex with her, then she's not Ex enough, and he is cheating on you. he CAN control himself, but apparently doesn't choose to bother to do so. if the invitation was honest, why didn't he suggest taking you to dinner with this Ex ? He's immature and unfair to you. Move on.

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