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Question
Posted by: Yum | 2005/07/18

Hostility at work - how to deal with it

I’ve started working at a new company about two months ago. I’m doing what I enjoy most and what I’ve studied for for so long. I’m learning new things every day and the woman I’m working for is a fantastic person.

However, there are many days that I struggle to the point of tears at the prospect of having to come to work. Why?? The hostility, backbiting and gossip that goes around with some of the other staff. Many days I am able to shield myself from it by surrounding myself with the good people at work (and there are a few really good people here). I’d throw myself into my work just to escape it, with good consequences – my work is up to date and in order, but there are more bad days than good, where I feel that it is wearing me down. I’m tired all the time, just from feeling as if I don’t know who to trust and because I have to have my guard up all the time. Sometimes the hostility is outright, sometimes directed at me, sometimes I’d overhear the gossip about some other unfortunate person. There’s always whispering and sidelong looks. My office is situated near the pause area, and I always hear what goes on. I don’t know if they’re aware that they can be heard or if they just don't care. I don’t want to leave, the training I am receiving here is fantastic and I don’t know if it’ll be better anywhere else. I think I just need to find a way to deal with it so that I don’t feel the way I do. I don’t think I should leave because of a few bad worms who make things unpleasant for everyone, when the company is otherwise a really great place to work. Any suggestions on how to deal with this?

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageCyberShrink

Discuss this with the HR dept of the company ; and talk it through with those good people at work, asking for advice based on how they cope with this situation. Meanwhile, ignore the bad guys, who presumably get their kicks out of seeing you and others getting upset by them.

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3
Our users say:
Posted by: Red | 2005/07/18

Just ignore them cos they will just pull u down in da dumps with them .... buy urself a radio so that the music can muffle out their voices....

Reply to Red
Posted by: Liza | 2005/07/18

Does your company have an HR department? If they do, you can lay a complaint with them which HAS to be followed up on. They're also supposed to keep the complainant confidential to prevent further hostility coming your way. And yes, most people do have office politics. The best option is to just avoid it and not take part.

Good Luck
Liza

Reply to Liza
Posted by: Paul | 2005/07/18

Corporate politics is a fact, it will always be there. Console yourself in the fact that participants in it, are mostly insecure and suffer from low self esteem. Best practise is to remove yourself from the situation and not get involved. If someone tries to co-erse you into saying something nasty, just say you don't know the person well enough to substanciate the comment.

Kind Regards

Paul.

Reply to Paul

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