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Question
Posted by: mamutsha | 2004/01/07

hiv and need a baby

i need to know if my life is at risk if i do get pregnat and i recently got married and my husband is looking for a baby now so i need to know if i'm at risk

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Our expert says:
Expert ImageGynaeDoc

You are not at greater risk if you fall pregnant. There is a risk of transmission to the baby of about 20% with no treatment. You are likely to be more prone to infections so should seek help early if you have any cough or discharge.

Best wishes

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2
Our users say:
Posted by: hiya | 2004/01/08

Hi there,

DOE, I'm sorry to read your story, and I fully agree with the message you're trying to convey, but completely off the point, do you really think it's fair to blame the wife for not knowing of your brother's illness? Should he not have had the responsibility of telling his own family, if she told hers? I don't know, I'm just asking and I know this has nothing to do with me, but I worry about a situation like that although I know that you probably miss your brother terribly and that you need someone to blame.

Anyway, I fully agree that mamutsha should think very long and hard. Firstly, you shouldn't be worried about the risk to yourself, but rather about the risk to your baby, should you fall pregnant. It sounds to me like your husband wants the baby more than what you do...? Think carefully, because firstly, yes, the risk is quite big that you will transfer the HIVirus to your baby, although the chances can be reduced by medication. Like DOE said, even if the baby is not infected and it is healthy, what happens when you pass away? Also a pregnancy might take it's toll on your body to some extent that you might be slightly worse off health-wise after having the baby than before you fell pregnant, and being HIV+, that's not something you want.

Either way it will be your choice and whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.

Reply to hiya
Posted by: DOE | 2004/01/08

Please forgive me if I'm a bit harsh - other readers may differ from me, but please read on .Have you guys thought hard about the baby? What IF he/she contracts HIV? What if you get really sick and pass on? Can you leave a little child to fend for itself because if you are infected and your husband not and you have unprotected sex he will get infected and in time your husband will also pass on. Here is my reason for asking:
My brother has a girl out of wedlock who is thirteen years old now. He married and they have a son ten years old. The family used to carry on about how the boy needs a companion because he was spoilt rotten, but they would just laugh it off and say he has an older sister. then he suddenly fell ill in July 2000. Two weeks before my brother passed on they decided to call the family to the doctor's room and there we heard he had full blown AIDS. In September he passed on - We lost contact with the wife. We dropped her because she had already told her family long before he fell ill about his illness, but did not have the decency to tell us - she made a doctor tell us twoo weeks before he passed on. The son looks healthy and visits occasionaly. We don't know if the mother is still OK or if she is infected (the son lives with her parents), or if the boy is infected.
Please think carefully about your decision to have kids. Read the papers or watch TV where you will find out about the little orphans - they never asked to be born.
Good luck, and be strong!

Reply to DOE

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